Hello everyone, its been a while, mainly because I wasn't sure what to write about. but I thought that I may as well write an update for you guys who still read my blog :)
Well in terms of my emotional health and transition, not much has changed there unfortunately and I desperately need to see a doctor soon, but due to feeling really worn out, and being scared, although I know I shouldn't be, I find it difficult to force myself to make and go to an appointment.
However I do actually bring good news for a change! (which feels strange), despite being withdrawn from college in October due to poor attendance from being depressed and ill, I applied to university and I have already been offered an unconditional place at The University of Wales, Trinity Saint Davids, Lampeter, to study theology and religious studies this September, which is amazing, although im still waiting for responses from other universities, Its a huge relief to know that in September ill finally be at university, which is long overdue. and it is such a relief that im finally moving on with my life. I cant tell you how much it means to me.
Another few things which are helping me get through my depression is, one of my best friends being able to talk to me every day (albeit only the one message) which I really appreciate even though I might not show it to her, she means a lot to me.
Also watching streams on Twitch.tv, mainly the streams of Kungfufruitcup and Mssnowhite, which have been such a huge help with my depression and just helping to pick up my mood and to cope through the day, which is a massive help, and I cant describe how much their streams help me, even if I have had to adjust my sleeping schedule to watch them, as it really helps me just to get through the day, as they are both super friendly and welcoming, and its just amazing to be a part of their chats and make me feel so loved and welcomed in their streams, it really does help me just cope. They are just so amazing, and I am so lucky to have found their channels so I can have some human contact almost daily and just be a small part of their awesome streams and lives. I cant over state how much they help, just being able to watch their gaming streams and to chat with them and other people on their chat. I just cant express it.
Also the church and God is helping me cope too, I know I still need to see a doctor about this, all of what im getting is actually keeping me from the worst of wht I could be going through, which I am grateful for every day. And I thank God for leading me to all these thing that do help me cipe, from church, and my homegroup and the friends ive made their, to my best friend, and the streams, it all just means the world to me that I have access to them all. Its an incredible blessing, although things are still tough they all just make the darkness just that bit brighter! :)
*massive hug*
Thanks for reading
Natalie
Xxx
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