The incoming tide

The dam is breaking.

The pain swelling,

The panic setting,

Tears flowing,

With no way to cope.

Isolated, 

Scared,

Scared of self harming,

Which grows greater,

Greater each day that passes,

As my internal struggles grow....

The walls around my pain are crumbling,

With nothing to keep them in place,

With each day I grow uncertain,

I’ll make it through,

Through this crisis in one piece....

I know that the isolation is important;

Yet it is draining my ability,

Ability to go on. 

The little strength I had before,

Is leaving before my very eyes,

Yet I know that, 

That it’s important to keep the isolation,

But at a terrible price to me...:

This may seem selfish,

And I feel awful for feeling this way,

Yet as the pain,

Unfelt and undealt with pain,

Years of it stored inside.

Starting to rise...

With not being prepared,

Or any way to cope with it at all, 

I just know, this ,

This won’t end well at all,

And that,

Terrifies me...

I just wish I knew how to see past this,

Not knowing how long it’ll last for....

I just don’t want to be,

Be washed away,

Along with this incoming tide...: