I have spent
the last 3 hours reading “Undivided” by Vicky Beeching. (before writing this which taken about 1hr and a half) And just Wow, this is
the most brilliant and amazing memoir I have ever read. Although the book is
obviously deeply faith centric, and I strongly felt God working in and through Vicky’s
life and story, there is so much in this book, not just for those who are in
the Church.
I myself
identify with a fair amount of issues raised in the book, especially when it
comes to repressing parts of yourself, for whatever reason, and I know from my
own experience how harmful it is. I identify as a Transgender Woman, and a Christian
myself. So, I know how hard it is to come to terms something that is a part of
who you are (which I have already somewhat written about on this blog already
(not this blog post but the blog in general)).
With myself
though it has cost me one of my closest friends at the time, and any chance of a relationship with my Dad and a
large part of my family. After telling my Dad in order to have a relationship
with me, he has to accept me as me, and not to pressure me, this was his reply “You protect yourself. Sorry. I have two
daughters already. Dont need other fake one. If thats how you feel then its
goodbye. I have not time for misconceptions of personality. Faggott”
And that
will be the last thing I’ll ever hear from him (especially after all the damage
he did BEFORE that (as my Nan and them he abandoned me to social services
(literally, when I was 7/8))
And I only
bring this up, as I know that many people will be easily be able to relate to
Vicky’s story and relate to similar experiences in their own lives. Especially
those who are a part of the Church, but even those beyond can read this, and know
that they are not alone in their struggles, and it is good, healthy and right
to talk about them, and to accept, and love who you are. Which can be a long
process but it will be worth it and better in the end.
One thing I was
constantly thinking whilst reading Undivided was that this book is going to
make waves, and have a huge impact, and is part of the groundwork, that Vicky,
and others are essentially working towards. Which is a major shift in Theology.
Which I’m excited about, especially as it is a field I want to one day enter
into myself (academically). And in this divide between the Church and the LGBTQ+
community can and hopefully will, be broken.
Also, I think
another thing Undivided captures, in essence, is how painful and stifling to
both Individuals, and the Church as a whole, the drive to conform to beliefs
and tradition, without and open mind or heart. As by doing so, you don’t allow God
to come in, break, and remake you, which is an essential part of being a
Christian. Not to be rigid in your beliefs, as that is something that causes
experiences that Vicky has described in her book.
But more
importantly I strongly believe in by being so rigid, and inflexible to change,
you are shutting off the great potential God has for you, and in this you are
shutting off the flow of his love and grace, which often flows through you and
into those around you. And therefore, being rigid can help to suffocate a
church, and lead it astray from the calling God has for you and the church you
are a part of.
The most
important message which I took from the book (which I’m not exactly sure was
fully intended) goes beyond what the church needs to do, but what the Church
and society needs to do. Especially in this day and age. This is to become “Undivided” to look past our
own preconceptions, our fears, our ignorance, pride, or whatever else it could
be that can stop you from seeing, instead of the label of what makes them
different to you, to see the person that stands in front of you, with the same
wants and needs we all have, as we are all Human.
But in order
to be able to get to the point where we can do this, we need to find a place
where we are, in Vicky’s words,
“Freed from
shame and fear, we are finally able to live, and love, from a place of wholeness.
We find peace. We become complete. We become people who we are, at our deepest
core, undivided”. If we can make the steps to do this individually in our own
lives, then hopefully, person by person, it idea, will not just be something
for own individual lives, which is crucial. But hopefully can be transferred to
something we can do to help transform out society so it too can be undivided.
I know that
this may be a strange way to write and go about a book review (as it wasnt exactly a review, but meh). However this is what
I got from, an amazing, and inspiring book, from a person I admire greatly, from
her old music career to her coming out story, and now this book, and someone I look
forward to seeing what they have in store for the future in Theology.
And I just wanted
to write and share, what I got most of all (which is only scratching the
surface) and most of all, I encourage you to go on amazon, or see if “Undivided”
is in your local book store, and pick up a copy and read it, whether you are a Christian
or not. As I strongly believe that the book, and Vicky’s story is well worth
reading as there is so much you can take away from this brilliant book. And I just
can’t recommend it enough, it’s just amazing.
And I just want
to thank Vicky for being strong, courageous and willing to share her story, for
us all to draw from. Which is why i believe that sharing personal stories like
this, in and out of Church, is becoming more and more important, as even just having
this conversation, and these stories being out is helping to erode the barriers
which have been up for far too long.
Thanks again
to Vicky for her book, and I recommend you all to pick up a copy and read it
for yourselves, it is something you definitely wont regret doing.
Hope you
have found this post somewhat interesting. (and really doesn’t reflect how good
the book is)
Hugs to all,
Natalie Xxxx
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